So… let’s get your power back.
But first things first….
Who am I to say this?
Someone who was not very in control of her life all the way up till age 19. Someone who was made to believe was incompetent for not being as efficient as the rest at school, someone who apparently couldn’t decide what was best for her to do the rest of her life and also someone bullied into believing she was way too ugly and different to fit in in this world.
In other words, someone daring enough to make the rest of the world feel uncomfortable just by mere existing and being completely unaware of it.
A wild woman in the make.
Nowadays I’m more like a freak leading a very interesting life, or at least a life I’m proud of.
Others will quickly venture to call me or label me all sort of things for surviving successfully to the hell some men and women have tried/managed to put me through. However…what doesn’t kill you makes you harder… and like coal under strong amounts of pressure… one becomes diamond hard.
Why am I actually doing this?
Firstly, because I thought most people have figured out what I did at the age I started taking my self portraits which got me into sell photos. Women wanted to have pictures taken of themselves looking like I did, and I thought… well, what goes into one of my looks it’s all that those stones I used to build my own power.
I reached that conclusion analyzing the praise and compliments I was getting from friends and strangers alike, some for my self portraits, others for my actions in day to day life and decisions they saw me taking and the reasoning behind. “No way. I can’t believe you said that to him, what? he didn’t run away to the hills after that?!!”.
I’m still feel flattered to be perceived this way as I still remember I wasn’t always like that. So I wanted to help more people feel good with themselves to their unapologetic selves. Because only those who say what they feel when they feel it and are honest about their feelings get the best out of life.
It took me a little time to remember exactly what did I do to start unleashing my true daring self, but remembered the most important and decisive steps I followed.
It’s not like I’m a popular famous person, nor do I want that burden, I enjoy living a life I enjoy. At the moment decicated to help other people, be that helping them learning how to speak English with a more natural approach, doing photos that show their photogenic faces (and here it’s important to be your authentic true self to look genuinely photogenic, as for me photogenia it’s nothing more than just that of feeling good in your own skin), or giving advice to those who have followed me closely in life and know no matter how insane my decisions in life may look like, they actually work to get what you want.
How does it work?
Each week you’ll get in your e-mail a new link and password to log in to the content of my web page dedicated to this project. Each week you’ll get a basic change in attitude which is necessary to rule your life and create it to your fancy.
You will also get the reasoning behind such a decision, links that support such reasoning as the most successful and effective approach in life to lead a happy life. The silly thing that perhaps led me to take such a decision or what music motivated me at the time. You may get many tips on how to flirt, on how to get women liking you, men wanting you, making people fall head over heels in love with you, how to spark your love life with a loved one, how to make the best of each situation or the motivation to change it if you feel you’ve had enough.
Can I get a tester? Yes. Keep reading.
What if we take ownership for having neglected ourselves? What if we notice the enemy lies mainly within our own brains?
Initially I thought I was just a victim of my circumstances. They didn’t like me, that was it. Perhaps it was the other way around…. I didn’t like myself and as a consequence I just attracted experiences that supported my belief.
The difficulty is accepting it is all down to you. Or all up to you.
Since I thought my life couldn’t get any worse anymore it had to get better.
Seems like a simplistic realization or a stupid belief.
But because I truly believed it was that way. Somehow it became that way.
I became all of a sudden pretty, intelligent, smart, worthy of admiration, “fucking beautiful” as I had plenty of guys telling me and what not.
Unfortunately I learnt grass always seems greener on the other side, I wouldn’t think girls and women could feel envious of me at all.
So yes, even being popular and being considered cool and pretty is also bad. Then men want to have you and call you a whore when they can’t. And girls want to be like you and they can’t. Or so they think.
I since left jobs in the spur of the moment when I felt slightly abused or I noticed or felt a certain level of unfairness I wasn’t enjoying. I have left good relationships because it wasn’t in my goals then to have a relationship or I felt I didn’t love them the way they deserved to be loved, I have left relationships when I felt they were trying to make me feel less than them or tried to manipulate me. And I have left friends who showed me they aren’t such in the blink of an eye.
It took me well over 19 years to learn to love myself and my decisions and I wasn’t going to spoil it or let anyone get in the way of my dreams, my self-respect or my integrity.
Most people dump those dreams or ambitions of finding a better love experience from their partners and settle for whatever love they get, they put a “relationship” in a pedestal and as something you should sacrifice your life and goals for. They neglect their friends for it, they neglect their life for it even, and sometimes that other person it’s not even worthy of such love.
So hence I started my project. I noticed people fall prey of abusive relationships because they do not love themselves. It takes two mentally healthy and balanced people to make a relationship work. If one of the two pretends to be one at first but isn’t it will fail.
People need to love to be alone, they need to love their own company. Only then they will set boundaries that keep them safe in any kind of relationship.
If you notice you end up having to remind them of your boundaries way too often perhaps they’re not healthy enough to respect you and that makes them an unsuitable partner, especially if they refuse to respect you by denying their disrespectful actions and not working effectively to resolve such yet expecting you to love them all the same and forgive them time and time again for their disrespectful behaviour which they often deny.
I do think loving yourself it’s the more important thing you can ever do in your life for yourself. When you are at peace and in love with who you are, flaws and all then you will not sacrifice who you are and what you want out of life to fit a partner or any kind of relationship in your life. You just don’t need it.
Is my life super perfect then? not at all. You can have all your shit together and still find people who pretend to have it all together and then it turns out slowly and gradually that they have a persistent need to hurt other people with their unsolicited and insensitive comments who are aimed at dimming your light, making you feel less than you are and less deserving of the love you deserve. They will flatter you and then they will devalue you in one single blow, and unless you’re comfortable with who you are already and have accepted all your flaws it may hurt you.
If your sense of worth comes from deep within you nobody has that power to hurt you. However you may still feel bothered and annoyed that they keep trying persistently on it till the point that you find yourself more setting up boundaries or defending them than enjoying the relationship.
If there is no peace because you feel they are attacking your self-esteem and confidence slowly but surely, they are then trying to hurt you, and be that conscious or unconscious if they seek no help to overcome such a need and they refuse therapy or they don’t change their behaviour and keep making hte same mistake of trying to undermine your confidence critizing your skills, highlighting your flaws whenever possible to make themselves look above you and above all wasting your time denying all that is taking place by projecting on your their toxic needs to feel superior or better or more worthy of having you by trying to control you, belittle, demean you and offend you then you hesitate not.
When you’ve done as much introspection as I’ve done with pleny of songs and wondered whether they’re right and the problem is not their abuse but your reactions to the shit the thing they do and a certified therapist tells you actually you’re being a victim of passive aggressive behaviour then you realize it has to end.
Because whenever possible I try to live a life with integrity, true to myself, true to my decisions. Regardless of how crazy people think they are. I have had two children which I loved dearly and wanted to give them the best of my time and I hardly felt like it living with such a person. Of course the father of the children was comfortable in the relationship, if only I weren’t so demanding, if only I weren’t so unforgiving, if only I weren’t such a messy head, if only I took every shit action he did or didn’t do and stuffed it in we would have had the perfect marriage forever.
Do you think what’s crazy? Try to live a life you no longer enjoy based on someone else decisions on how your life should be.
Be that your parents, the media, religion, your friends, etc.
“Why did you leave …..? Who is going to love you as much as he did?”.
That question totally caught me off guard when I left my first boyfriend… oh yeah. I was like “you know… I haven’t even thought about it. But I’m not going to stay with a person just because they love me.”
How can I love myself by betraying my own ideals and integrity?
How can I love myself settling for less than what I believe I can get. And honestly didn’t mind being single forever at all in that purpose. But life seems to have a magical way of working and won’t let you be alone if you’re enjoying your solitude.
In fact if there is a God up there it has a fucked up sense of humour. When you want to find boyfriend and settle down you won’t find anyone. When you are so busy fulfilling your career or goals a person will come in your way and you will get sort of forced to choose, but if ith’s the right person you can stick to the goals and they will stay still with you because the right person have their shit together, also appreciate their solitude, their goals and their peace and don’t need you to survive.
They may find life better and more exciting since you showed up but they won’t depend on you. And it will or should be the same way for you in order to have healthy and balanced loving relationships.
Relationships out of pleasure and joy to share your time together, not relationships in which you have to put up with a ton of cons and little pleasure.
That is more worrying. Unlike her, my loneliness didn’t scare me at all anymore. I was more scared and concerned about wasting my time and their time and loving with the wrong person. I’m just too honest to live a lie.
I had been alone before, I had been to hell and back a couple of times and learnt how to cancel my pity party and all that negative though that made me vulnerable to illness. And my loneliness showed me how to fill it up with ambition, woke me up and made me decide to take control of the outcomes of my life.
I now have to personally thank all those bullies one by one for bringing me down back in the day. Sure, I spent some dark years exploring the depths of hell for not being like the rest of sheeple kissing someone else’s ass or intimidating people due to their own insecurities. Oh yes… I remember all that too well and I overcame it all and decided I will not ever again tolerate any abuse of any kind.
But I still thank them because thanks to them I learnt to master my fate from age 20 onwards. “What doesn’t kill us makes stronger, locked and loaded, ready to fight“. After being to hell and back several times life can only get easier from that moment onwards.
Another reason why I’m doing this is because some people who have seen my self-portraits have asked me to do photos of them looking like I do. And while I have the technical skills to do so (photographically speaking) I’ve noticed not all people can speak volumes with their eyes like I apparently seem to do (based on a tons of comments I’ll take it it’s what I transmit with them).
Those who know nothing about my portraits seem to admire me for my bravery, honesty, courage, resilience and my getting what I want, even if my methods sometimes look a bit weird or outright crazy to them.
And that’s what most people seem to admire and praise about me. My ever so courageous soul. They want to get their way too, they want to rule in their lives and they forget they have the power to do so
And now people who think you are lofty headed will call you sick individual for enjoying your life and not taking any more of their shit. But let that be it. I won’t lose sleep trying to please those who feel offended by me doing what they don’t have the guts to try doing themselves.
If I survived it all so can you. I don’t think I’m any better than anyone else. I’m a normal living human who has cracked just this code of getting away with what they want. And so can most humans if they really wanted to.
The end result they have noticed is that I never do worse, I always get better with my “risky” choices. So even though they think my approach is crazy later they call me for advice because they know it works, or at least it works for me. And those who follow suit completely do get their successful results they wanted. I helped two friends getting married already with such apparently outrageous advice.
And that’s what I aim to do with my online course “Find your wild side” which I strongly recommend doing before doing a photosession with me. This attitude will bring the absolute best you have in you… not only in photos, but in life.
I would be helping you do this of achieving what you really want.
I can’t show you how to be me, nor would I want you to look like “me”.
They only thing I can help you with is to show you the steps I followed to become the person I am today proving the person I have been in the past so you can do it as well.
I can help you learn the steps and the music I listened to in the past and the one I do currently listen to that helps me being my most authentic and genuine self, which is basically the one that shines through in person or in photos.
I used to be extremely unphotogenic, but once I discovered and embraced my wild side…. things changed a lot for me and now I can clearly say that I have my moments, not only in photos because as it says in the quote below…
Music can help you remember the past so you can deal with it, validate your feelings, embrace your own your story, make sense of it, realize it’s all up and in your hands to change the rest of it and raise even higher and brighter than ever before.
So please, let me help you find music that will uplift you and inspire you to do and feel better, stronger, more capable, good, happy, cheerful, and more likely to nail the night when you get ready to go out, or some that will help you release all the anger and resentment bottled up from years of feeling like a doormat or people pleaser that doesn’t help you feel good now.
Because sometimes the only thing that it’s stopping us from doing better in life is all those things we did not do or did not say, all that pent-up anger and frustration we didn’t let out when feeling betrayed or let down by someone, all those putting up with crap not meant for you because you were fread of raising your voice or making a stand. Or all those choices someone forced us to make or take because they thought it was the best thing for us or society imposed it that way when deep down we knew then they weren’t meant for us. They were choices that perhaps were thought to be “for our own sake” but really it was for theirs, nobody knows what is best for us. What we know is that when we allowed ourselves to be persuaded into another choice we felt like we betrayed ourselves. Yes, that might have been the “wise” or “safe” choice according to most, but sometimes that is what gets you “depressed” and “unmotivated” for years. You’re not living your passion you have no motivation to wake up in the morning to go to work because you know that if you could choose you wouldn’t have chosen that job in particular to put an example. Is like there is something your gut instinct told you to do which you ignored. And you’re paying for it.
Although sometimes we can lie to ourselves and think we can control certain situations and make excuses for people or situations that are no longer good for us and sometimes we see us trapped on such situations and are unable to confront them or feel too vulnerable to speak about them. But with the right music that will be let out off your chest as well so you can unleash all those painful memories and find your true self.
If you’ve been clicking on the links by now you might have noticed that quote above is actually true.
Some songs do really help build up your confidence, others help you stay positive with their uplifting beats, some help you think and consider setting up new standards while doing both, others just feel good with who you are now, even if you get called psycho, crazy or diva for enjoying a good self-esteem besides what some abusers tried to do to you.
Remember, as long as you feel comfortable with who you are you become fearless and unstoppable. And you have absolute no idea of how great it feels to listen to your gut, follow your heart whilst not forgeting to take your head along with it. I honestly believe the gut and the brain are connected.
It’s kind of magic and it shows on photos as well. Even in real life, people feel naturally drawn to you, engage with you in conversation, admiring you for the vibes you transmit. And I did that just listening to music that showed me some lessons I needed to learn.
With this program (which you get included on the price of a Wild Session or a Before and After session) we will be able to explore why we do most of the things we do and how to change your decisions to suit your life goals better. Also as a result you’ll end up looking your best and radiating on your photoshoot with a new self-esteem boost that will last for as long as you keep doing those steps that get you there.
And if you live away and can’t have a photoshoot with me… or found your wild self already and just want music to keep rocking it….then just follow the link to keep you that way.
My aim with this program is to transform all people into leaders of their own lives rather than victims of someone else’s choice.
I want to make them active starring roles of how their own lives, and directors of how their life is going to be from now onwards.
People will take action to be in control of their lives, not under control of someone else’s intentions. Someone who will recognize any form or shape of mild abuse and recognize it for what it is and someone who will not have the need to put up with it. Because you’ll end up so fearless you won’t see the need to put up with it. If you talk with them and they do not agree to find a solution or won’t admit they’re trying to demean you, disrespect you, make you second guess yourself or gaslight you (the denial of all those is gaslighting in itself) then you will have the power and courage to walk away from such situations.
You’ll become your own hero/heroine. Because, nobody is going to save you unless you do so yourself.
I don’t want to convince anyone, I only want to work with people who are aware would like to do this program because they need to love themselves or because they want to master their own lives by having a say in who and what they let in their lives.